Just when it finally seemed that the bitterly acrimonious battle between Sir Paul McCartney and his estranged wife Heather Mills - played out in a remarkably public manner over the past few months - had finally petered out, Heathers lawyers have lashed out once again. Last week, reports claimed that, contrary to rumours the pair had finally decided to continue their divorce proceedings quietly and privately, Heather is preparing to make a series of bombshell revelations about Paul when their divorce case reaches the courts. Heathers lawyer, Antony Julius, has, according to friends of the former model, been compiling a file of serious claims by Heather about Sir Paul, all of which are to be made public close to the time of the trial.
Now Hollywood Snark can exclusively reveal that Heather is in fact an alien who has come to earth to steal the genes of the former Beatle so as to re-create the super-band back in her own galaxy. "No-one back home can believe that you humans were all fooled by her," says a rep from her home planet, "One leg, eyes on stalks, an inherent ability to repulse everybody who even looks at her. Okay so we get that Paul was taken in at first by her world-class bedroom skills learnt during a stint spent posing for mucky pictures in Germany, but how no-one else spotted her other-worldly qualities before now is completely beyond us."
